Finding Joy After Grief by Dena Dyer
“Rejoice in hope, be patient in tribulation, be constant in prayer” (Romans 12:12).
Do you ever feel as if God is hiding? That He’s not answering your prayers or even listening? I felt that way in 2020, when our sweet dog died, my firstborn moved out, a friend suddenly betrayed me, and my father and father-in-law died within twelve days of one another. Life felt cruel, and hope fled.
For at least two months, I sat and cried buckets of tears. I prayed honest prayers of lament and grief, asking God questions that I knew He could handle, but receiving few answers. However, over time, the deep sorrow lessened, and I gradually began to feel joy again.
During that heart-wrenching year, I thought about the disciples…those men and women who hid, trembling, in a small room after Jesus was crucified. We have the benefit of seeing the way the Resurrection changed everything; they didn't.
Christ's followers knew what Jesus had taught them, and the miracles they'd seen Him do in the past, but the experience of their leader's crucifixion left them shaken and scarred. They were afraid they might be hunted down, beaten, and put to death, too.
Maybe you're in a tomb-like situation, and the dark and doubt are stealing your joy. You’re weak, worn, and worried. You see no way that things could turn out any worse, and you're tired of praying, believing, and hoping. Life feels cruel and indifferent.
In this world recently rocked by a pandemic and roiled by natural disasters and political turmoil, God asks us to trust in the dark. It's not easy, is it? In fact, it can almost feel impossible.
However, Jesus taught that nothing was impossible with God…and He became an example of that when He rose from the dead.
In Romans, the apostle Paul instructs his fellow believers to “[r]ejoice in hope, be patient in tribulation, be constant in prayer” (Romans 12:12). We can only follow that command by being connected to our Creator, His word, His son Jesus, and the Holy Spirit. Daily, we can make the choice to turn to Him and not away from Him, even when we’re grieving or facing difficult circumstances.
I don’t know exactly how it works, but I know it does: when we pray with even a shred of faith, He moves. Our Heavenly Father turns our persistent pleading into peace and joy when we don't let feelings rule, but instead stand firm in the truth of God's word. This is the transformation and renewal of our minds that Paul writes about earlier, in Romans 12:2.
My prayer for all of us is that we would each grab hold of the precious promises God gives us, and that joy, not despair, would fill our world-weary hearts.
Prayer: Heavenly Father, it’s so easy for my mind to be consumed by bad news, worries about finances, or concerns about my family. Help me instead to fill my mind with thoughts of You and words from Your word, so that I can renew my mind and so You can renew my joy.
Dig Deeper: Read Romans 12.
Discussion Questions:
1) Think about a difficult season you’ve been through (or are currently in). Is your first inclination to turn toward God or away from Him when you suffer difficulties? Why do you think that is?
2) What are some ways you can fill your mind with God’s promises in order to renew your hope and joy?
about Dena Dyer
Dena Dyer is a multi-published author, professional speaker, and Bible teacher whose passion is sharing words of humor and hope with weary people. She enjoys coffee, traveling, and British television, and has been married to her hubby Carey for 25 wonderful years (plus a couple they don’t talk about). They have two young adult sons and love leading worship together at their church. Dena definitely spends too much time online or in the fast food drive-through--but she and the Lord are working on it.
