She said to them, ‘Do not call me Naomi; call me Mara, for the Almighty has dealt very bitterly with me.’
Ruth 1:20

The Old Testament book of Ruth has a depressing start. Elimelech, his wife Naomi and their two sons left their home in Bethlehem because of famine in the land. They went to Moab, where in a few years time Elimelech and both sons died.

Naomi and one daughter-in-law traveled back to Bethlehem. There she asked the townspeople not to call her by her given name anymore. Naomi meant “pleasant” or “sweet”. She named herself Mara – “bitter”.

She explained, “I went away full, and the Lord has brought me back empty.” (verse 21a) She left town with a husband and two sons and returned without them.

I wish I could say I have never felt hopeless, as Naomi did. In the last 5 years alone, my husband has dealt with job insecurity and cancer, and I’ve had cancer and chronic pain. We’ve had severe mental illness and abuse in our family as well as children straying from biblical truth. On top of that we have a daughter who has severe medical and developmental needs.

I want to tell you that my faith has never waivered – that I never felt bitter towards God. But that’s not the truth. One Sunday at church I couldn’t even bring myself to sing along with our praise band. “You’re a good, good Father. That’s who you are. That’s who you are.”

The words were familiar. And deep down I knew they were true. But all I could do was weep. I couldn’t comprehend my life getting any better this side of heaven. But here I am. Cancer free. Financially whole. Managing my daughter’s condition with the help and support of family.

As a good friend would say, “I still have more issues than Time magazine.” Every day is both a struggle and a victory. It’s a struggle to raise kids in this broken world. It’s a battle to beat back the darkness and depravity all around us. And we board the struggle bus daily parenting a special needs child. But I know the end of the story. That is why I have victory.

Bitterness does not rule or define me. It doesn’t change who I am. And it doesn’t hang around. Because I am a beloved child of God. He triumphs over evil in the end. And He is kind enough to give us glimpses of that victory here on earth. In our every day. Because I have salvation through Jesus Christ, I can put bitterness in its place. And it has no place in me.

Prayer:
Lord, this life can beat me down. I’m so thankful that You don’t leave me there. I know You care about every hair on our heads, so I know You care about my hurts and disappointments. In times of discouragement, show me Your faithfulness, glory and victory. Thank you for turning my bitterness into joy.

Dig Deeper:
Take time this week to read the book of Ruth. It’s only 4 chapters and the way God redeems Naomi’s story and takes away her bitterness will encourage you.

Discussion Questions:

What is presently causing you distress or pain? Write out your true feelings – no holding back. Get it all out and then throw it away if necessary.
Now write about any ways you may see God working in or through the situation. Ask Him how He wants you to respond and pray for Him to remove any bitterness in you.

About Lauren Sparks

Author & Fitness Instructor

Lauren Sparks is a wife and mom to two daughters – one with special needs – and one bonus son. She lives, worships Jesus and teaches yoga in the Dallas, Texas area. She is a contributing author for Perseverance: 30 Devotions for Faith that Moves Mountains, Prayer: Approaching the Throne of Grace, and The ABC’s of God’s Love Letter: a 25-Week Bible Study with Topics From Abide to Zeal. She shares her adventures, victories and flub-ups from her laptop at laurensparks.net.