Episode 146. Praying Confidently & Consistently with Val Woerner

Unedited Transcript

Val. I am so excited to have you today. Thank you for being with me. Oh, thanks for inviting me on. I'm excited to talk a lot of fun. I am so excited about your new book. It's called pray confidently and consistently. And one of the things I always love hearing is. Just like the path to holding the book in your hands, right?

Like anybody that writes or does this type of work, we all know that it's, it's much more than just, um, just spitting out a book that, you know, your end reader holds in their hands. And I just want to hear, like, how did God lead you to this message? Tell us all about it. Yeah. I have been, you know, working with people or talking to people about prayer for the last eight years.

Um, since we have the prayer journals, but it wasn't until my friend Gretchen, um, if you know, Gretchen she's from well-watered women, um, but we have. Been friends for a while. We have complimentary businesses, but she, she just told me one day, she was like, you need to write a book on prayer. And I just remember thinking to myself, you know, there's so many books on prayer already and thereby, you know, people who have gone to seminary school, you know, famous preachers, you know, like all these people, I just thought the world does not need my book on prayer.

And, um, and she pushed back and basically said, you know, There's probably a lot of people who don't want, or haven't picked up those books before, but they would pick up yours. Um, and that was that she kind of basically planted that seed and, um, Probably within that year, the Lord, just like, yeah. This idea for, for a book, the basically like the framework, what it would cover.

And it really all stemmed from just so many conversations with people over the last few years of what we've struggled, like why we've struggled to pray. And, um, and yeah, so it's really, I feel like this is like my legacy book of like what I would want people to know about prayer, the things that are holding us back and, um, and.

It's just been really cool to see how the Lord has put such a huge passion in my heart to not just, you know, sell a prayer journal or like help people in that aspect, but to really help them through their entire journey with prayer. Awesome. Okay. First of all, I love that Gretchen encouraged you in that well, before that, I love that you guys are friends DOR, Gretchen she's gosh, two or three times.

Now we love her around here. I love the work that well-watered woman does, and it makes sense that you guys. Sort of running the same lane and would be really close friends. So I love hearing about that conversation because I know Gretchen's heart. I love that she pushed back and encouraged you to take that step.

That's really awesome. And you're right. I think, yeah. You know, to any of us who, and, you know, I'm working on a book right now. I know a lot of our friends are writers that listen in. And I think that's such a great point that you bring up about, you know, yeah. There's, there's nothing new under the sun, right?

Like that's what they always say in our industry of like, There's no topic that's not been written on, but we all have such a unique set of life experiences that God has gifted us with that give us perspective and wisdom. That's different from other books on the shelf. So I love, I love hearing that. So one of the things that you are super passionate about, which I also love is prayer journaling.

So I want to hear, yeah. A little bit about your own kind of personal experience with pair journaling. How has God spoke to you through that practice? And I know there's probably women listening today who maybe even feel intimidated by a blank sheet of paper. So like, what's that experience been like for you?

And how would you encourage somebody who's maybe never tried prayer journaling. Yes. I, I love this question because, um, journaling, my prayers has been something that has transformed my prayer life, but also it's been a thing that has helped in the moments when I can't focus and I just need something written down, but it's also been the way that I've like tracked how the Lord has worked in my life.

Um, and I, I started at a really young age, so I've been doing this a while I say young, I mean like high school, I was. A writer. Like I, like I wrote these very angsty poems, like just I've always written. So, um, I think like if I was starting over and had never written, um, before I would probably just have to remind myself that like, whatever is said here, they're like the Lord is not judging what you're putting on paper.

He's not, um, looking for something to be perfect. Um, I know the advice of just saying like, you just have to start is like so annoying to hear, but I think like once we start, we start to get more comfortable with that and it doesn't have to be a full page. It could be two sentences that we just write at night before we go to bed.

Um, and having prompts is always helpful too. Like if you just have prompts of knowing like, What do I want to thank God for today? What do I want to ask God for today? What do I want to recognize about God today? What do I want to confess today? Like those things can propel, you know, as to, to journal and write.

Um, but I'm trying to think. I know, I know there's a lot of intimidation with that. And the first chapter of the book praying confidently and consistently we talk a lot about our expectations of God. And how, if we have different expectations with him or with ourselves, um, it can affect how we pray. Um, but I think once we kind of recognize.

His grace in the conversation and that he's not looking for perfection. We can kind of take that off of ourselves too. Yeah, that's really good. And I think, and you touched on this, but just keeping in perspective God's character and who he is, I think is a great way to color our prayers. So I love that you included, even in your prompts of like, what do I want to remember?

About God today, or what do I want to thank him for? Just because I'm so grateful for this aspect of his character, right. And that begins to even color, um, The way, the way that we pray. And I know that's been the case in my own prayer life. So I love hearing that. Okay. For somebody who feels maybe really discouraged today about their prayer life, what are some of the things that you think hold us back or often discourage us from spending time in prayer?

Um, and how would you maybe encourage somebody listening today to, um, To take that step or break away and take that time. Let's talk about that for a little bit. A lot of people, myself included what holds us back can be just this expectation that, um, when we come to prayer, we've heard people have these amazing stories.

We've heard that prayer, um, can be mountain moving, that it can be all these amazing things. But when we get started and we're new to this, it doesn't. Feel like that right off the bat. It can, it can have those moments, but more often than not, it comes from just consistently meeting with the Lord daily and not giving up because it feels, um, like it's not as great as we thought it was going to be.

Um, we can also just be held back because we it's not. Urgent. It's not something that's like tapping on our shoulder, reminding us to pray. You know, we have kids to feed. We have work to do. We have bosses. We have so many things demands that are put on our life and prayer is not demanding of us. It is, it is important, but it doesn't always feel urgent.

So I think, um, really just the demands of life and the way other things can just be a lot louder than prayer. Um, those things can really hold us back. Yeah, absolutely. I totally agree. And one of the things that I love that you talk about in the book is sort of like this scientific effect that prayer has on our mind.

And I would love for you to talk about, and I think this is so cool just about how God himself, he wired us to stay in communion with him and for somebody who has maybe never thought about that. I'd love for you to unpack that for us. Yeah. So, um, I heard this quote from a doctor and she basically said that.

12 minutes a day of prayer can change literally like your brain scan. I'm like, what's your brain scan looks like. Wow. And I thought this was really neat. Um, but then I, I did more research on this and I heard her a bottle of that and they were like, well, the same can be said, juggling or Buddhist meditation.

And at first they're really like, bummed me out just to hear like, oh, you know, you want prayer to be different and everything like that. And it is different, but the, the. Biggest takeaway that I had, or what that tells me is that we really need to be intentional. And that the actions that we repeat over and over and over again are going to affect us like the, um, the groups in our brain.

When we. Repeat something or do something over and over again, the grooves just get deeper and deeper and deeper until they just become automatic. So if we're trying to like rewrite negative thoughts or negative reactions to different things, um, it's going to take time to do that. But yeah, when it comes to prayer, like it just made me learning that just made me realize, um, How practical prayer can be in a sense that like, you know, we can rewrite the grooves of our brain, the negative thoughts, the worries that we have, the lies that we tell ourselves when we pray with a father who, um, just being in his presence, um, helps us to see what is true.

Helps us to recognize lies. Like I know. There are things that I believe whenever I am alone or looking at my phone, that whenever I'm praying with the Lord, I'm able to have a more heavenly perspective of things and, um, and kind of reject those lives. So, um, I don't know if that I know, uh, I did like a two hour course on science in the brain.

So if that's not what you were thinking, feel free to ask me specific questions. I'm happy to talk more about it. I love this. Yeah, no, I think it's so good. And I mean, Okay. Yeah, there, we all know that there are a lot of things in life that could alter our brain activity. Right. But like to think actually spending time in the presence of God, communing with God in prayer has that effect on our brains.

Like that matters, right? Like when we think about scriptures, like. Taking our thoughts captive to the obedience of Christ and, um, just, I mean, it's, we see it all over the pages of scripture of like, we, we do have a choice right too. And it makes me think of Jenny, Allen's get out of your head message. I'm basically like wording how she's like, we have a choice in, in our thought lives.

We can continue going down these negative thought patterns that are hardwired in our brain, or we. Have the choice to change that by the power of the holy spirit inside us. Right. And the fact that there's a piece of that. Right. And I just think that's really important to remember. Yeah. And, uh, it's, it's like, you know, every verse in the Bible that talks about meditating on truth and scripture, and part of that part of prayer is actually us saying that back to God.

Like I think about the Psalms a lot, like when David would say different things and, um, You know, he would say something full of faith. Like Lord, you are strong, you were my protector. And then he would have a few verses of just feeling like, why is this happening to me? This is scary. You know, like I'm going through really hard stuff.

And then he would come back to that same truth. And it was almost like he was having to remind himself of that truth with the Lord. And, um, I just think that that's really cool that we get to do that with the Lord in prayer and, um, you know, A lot of times, whenever I'm talking to somebody and they're, they're feeling like overwhelmed with like, feeling like they repeat prayers or they're praying for the same thing.

Like that is not a bad thing. Repeating a prayer, repeating something daily that we're lifting up. We're surrendering to the Lord that is creating a new groove in our mind that. Whatever we're praying for. Like, if we're saying Lord, you know, like, um, I'm afraid of this, I am praying for you to help me through this comfort meet, you know, like help me walk through this.

Um, that is just another, another moment that we're getting to like, create those deeper grooves in God's truth, as opposed to the lies that just kind of like swamp our brains. And, and if we're not actively trying to change those, it will, um, they will just. Drift to a, a negative place. That's the beauty of getting to pray to God.

Yeah, that's so good. Okay. I am. I'm so excited about this book. I'm going to say the name for it. One more time. The name of it. One more time for people who may have not caught it at the beginning, it's called pray confidently and consistently. And we've talked a little bit about your story and kind of what drove you to this message.

And so. Before we wrap up, I want to give you the opportunity for those who have maybe not heard your story. I'd love for you to share a little bit more about the story behind the Val Marie paper. Tell us all about it. Yeah. So I was, um, I was creating wedding invitations and my husband and I had a business doing that.

Um, and my husband and I were thinking about having kids and, um, we, I had also been planning, weddings and was. There was a very stressful job. I knew that I, I didn't want to do that with kids. Um, and I ended up just going to the wedding invitations. It was a very looking back on my prayer journal, which was just.

Actually, it was just like an empty note, you know, like a blank notebook of written prayers. There were so many prayers where I was like, God, what are you doing? I thought you wanted me to drop the weddings. And now, like I'm not selling enough with the invitations and in that process, but we got pregnant.

And so I was super, not super sick, but in my, in my world, I was super sick. I'm a hypochondriac and I can feel everything in my body. So I was. Overwhelmed with anxiety. And I knew that if I was going to make it through pregnancy, I needed to be able to pray consistently. And it couldn't be like I had tried it, you know, um, lined moleskin journal where I'd like write prayer requests in and that just didn't work.

I didn't. I didn't know how to like organize. I just wanted to organize it in my brain. And I ended up picturing this format and I really thought it had to exist. And I searched for it on Google for two months. And when I couldn't find it, my printer actually was like, well, I can make a for you, but you know, like you need to make at least 50 of them.

I can't just print you one of them. And, um, I decided to just put that out there with the audience that I had for like weddings and everything. And it was very well received and it's, it's so funny because I'll always think back to how naive I was to think. Like I thought I was the only one who struggled with prayer.

I thought I was the only one who got distracted and wanted to organize my thoughts like that. And, um, that was eight years ago I think. And, um, it it's just blown me away. How, how many journals we've gotten to get into people's hands and the impact that it's having on people's prayer lives. Yeah, that's amazing.

I love that story and I love where you started too, man. I can not imagine planning weddings. I got married two years ago. I planned my own man. I never I'm so thankful. I'll never do it again. Um, it's such a fun season, but there's so many decisions to make and it just, it was a really stressful season of life.

So you go, girl, that's not mine. That's my job for me. Um, But I love that. That's where he started. Well, I I've loved this conversation. I'm so excited about your new book, pray confidently, and consistently it'll be out in the world by the time people listen to this episode, I actually think it's going to drop the day your, um, your book releases, which is really fun.

I love what I get to do that. So yeah, go, go check out, pray confidently and consistently. And. What we're going to do now is head on over to our Patrion platform. And we're going to get to know Val a little bit better over there. So if you are a subscribed patron, making sure you don't miss out on this extra part of the conversation, but for now, Val, I just want to say a huge thank you for your time today.

And that you'd be a guest I'm so, so grateful. Thank you for having me.